build your core values

Posts tagged ‘people’

ASK FOR HELP… Or Should You?

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Who would you ask to help you do something, or would you be reluctant?

    Have you hesitated to ask someone for help for fear of rejection or embarrassment? Why do you think it’s hard for some people to ask? Would you ask for help when things become difficult, OR  would you push through it no matter what? Would you just pretend nothing was wrong? I, personally believe for some it’s pride that may jump in and cause a person to feel embarrassed. Maybe, it’s just hard to accept help, and easier to not ask. I, your writer have had this happen to me. I assume that if I ask someone to help me, they would probably say… “I can’t.., don’t have time, no, maybe later” (of course that may never come). So, there have been times that I had to do something that would have gone much better with two people, but now, because I didn’t ask for help, it’s only me.

What is an idea? It’s a thought or suggestion as to a possible course of action. Ideas will be maximized when more than one opinion, suggestion or thought is provided. Think back, how many ideas have you offered to others, only to have them look at you like you’re strange, or ignore what you’ve said and go on with the conversation? Worse yet, they flat-out tell you ‘it is’

Since I am an interior decorator, I see this often when it comes to decorating people’s home or small office. People want to elaborate on their ideas for their space. You sometimes listen (good thing) and other times, your mind is telling “no”, but you continue to smile. I may say “that’s a great idea” only if I really feel that way. If not, I don’t knock their idea off the table, but I may ask them to elaborate more, as I interject with something that would be pleasant and add to their idea. Maybe it’s something I’ve done before, or thought about using as an idea. Nevertheless, there is sometimes when people are adamant about using something that isn’t going to do anything for the room at all. I’ve done it, and I knew it wasn’t anything I would do for myself, but it’s not about me. My point is not to be superficial, but recognize that the idea may be a good one…for that person’s taste.

So when do you actually ask for help? What would it take? Would you ask someone at work (who you weren’t exactly friends with, or a stranger (if it were necessary) or then, a friend or relative? Or, is it just easier to do-it-yourself? There is absolutely nothing wrong with doing-it-yourself, but think of how you could expand on your ideas with someone else? This is what we do to help do-it-yourself(ers) to see the joy and excitement behind sharing ideas. I really get excited with them when I can offer them a way of getting what they propose. Money is often the cause of not getting what they want, or picking something that they won’t be able to live with for more than a week. Do you know anyone whose had an issue like this or just cannot stand the choices they’ve made while in their decorative and creative mode?

Knowing when to ask for help…is not always easy, but it is easier than you think. And, you should! Most people never mind helping someone else when it necessary or needed.  Asking is the key. Pride often steps in before you and cancels out your thought to ask or the words to speak….Help!!! Don’t let your pride or mind-reading skills (you just know that person will say “no” or look at you strangely for asking) . You never know, unless you ASK. And yes, you definitely should.

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IS YOUR PERSONAL IMAGE A REFLECTION OF YOUR HOME?

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You probably answered with a resounding NO, but I would say yes. One’s image can tell a history or story without words spoken, and one’s home can do the same thing. We often say we really don’t care what people think, but deep down, we do. Someone sees you from across a room or interacting with others and decides they know you based on how you look, act or react. Someone sees your home on the outside and decides they know how it looks on the inside. It may seem like it’s something small, but image can be a big booster or a let-down for any of us.

 Awhile back, I spent a good deal of time talking to businesses and schools making people aware of how important their image was to their success in life. Unfortunately, it’s true. We are not quick to judge ourselves and correct our ways for the better, and we allow others to do it for us. When we leave ourselves or our home open for someone else to judge, we are hurt and sometimes angry. This happens even when you don’t ask anyone’s opinion. Who has the right? No one has the right to ridicule, but people take it upon themselves to judge, and sometimes they are making the decisions.

 Since I have been an interior decorator, I have treated my clients the same way that I did when I was teaching about positive image. I teach them and empower them to recognize that the way they feel and the choices they make for their home will have a reflection on them.  I feel the image of home is a true reflection of how I think and feel about myself (at any given time). I want things to be nice and in a place. When everything is all over, I notice I get stressed and not as productive.

 

  • The more I do interior decorating, the more I know that image is so important. Not for others, but for myself. For myself or anyone else, it’s a reflection of how we may think about things or it’s a point where you can see something is not right for you. You know that if you  like your home decorated and neat,  and suddenly is looks like a storm came through most of the time, there may be other things going on with you.

 

  • You may feel inadequate in decorating your home. Many people do. Ask for help. This is what I do, and so many others like me. We cannot know how to do all things at all times. I even ask other decorators for help when I need to. Never be too proud to ask.

 

Sometimes, your home reflects something that is not true about you. It has its own image, based on what you do with it and to it. It doesn’t have to be fancy, but it must bear the image you want to display for others to remember, and you must be aware of that image. Image is here, not going anywhere, and people will continue to judge. Be your own judge, and live with your decisions about who you are. Change yourself when you become aware that you are happier and more content when you take charge of the image of your home and of yourself. Don’t change because everybody else wants you to; change because it’s right for you.

You be the judge and think about your image. Does your home pick up your personal image? Yes or no?

 

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